Ok, I know I haven't posted in awhile…here. Been quite busy over at the new site, You, Simplified. I've been playing around with a Flip MINO camcorder recently and did a few videos of the kids. Turns out that the babies don't do much when they know the camera's on them.
But…at least you get to see some full motion video of them. This first video is of Noah doing…umm…I donno.
The second video is mom wearing an authentic Scribe for the Tribe t-shirt and showing how well Ms. Bella stands and chews on human appendiges. And, the frantic sounds in the background are Noah, minus his blood pressure meds (seriously, the kid's on Norvasc).
And finally, Mr. Owen being fed green shyt (very poorly) by yours truly. And guess who's going nuts in the background without his blood pressure meds?
Filed under Triplets by
Owen, Noah (Vomit Action Shot) and Bella on Halloween
Okay, just realizing that it's been nearly two months since I've done an update on the babies, which makes me derelict in my blogging duties, but I assure you we've been busy around here.
Mr. Noah came home from the hospital on the god awful formula that smelled like fermenting potatoes (I suspect it also tasted like fermenting potatoes) and we went thru several weeks of hell where he crapped six times daily and he wasn't all together happy about the process. While being regular is good for one's mood, there is certainly a case of taking it too far.
He also wasn't putting any weight on with that junk and the three hour feeds were making us miserable. So we were happy a few weeks back when they finally put him on the same formula as his brother. Within a week, he was doing so much better, and was really putting on weight. Were it not for his unusually large cranium, his body would all but be caught up in size. He is absolutely adorable and I love him even when he's screaming bloody murder at 2am every night and waking up the other kids (yes, really, every night).
Noah and Bella, Appetizers before Dinner
It's really amazing, Noah can fit both his hands in his mouth. Bella tries to but Noah really has a big mouth.
Ms. Bella is our little star, and with that, sometimes the primadonna. She amazes me everyday with her vocalizations already. You can really see that she is trying to learn to talk by watching mom and dad (Note to self, now is the time for me to strike the "F" word from my vocabulary). Her body strength is amazing too, and she was the first to coordinate both of her hands to grab at toys above her head. She seems to be hitting every development milestone a little faster than the boys.
She has absolutely the most beautiful smile when you play with her. Unfortunately, every time we try to take a picture she puts on her best Mona Lisa smile. Of course, she can crank with the best of them too and it seems that mom is the only one who can regularly get her to calm down. Nobody said it would be easy.
Bella at Tummy Time
The picture of Bella above is actually a couple of weeks old, and she now regularly raises her head when on her tummy. The boys aren't quite there with this yet.
I'll end with a short note on Mr. Owen. He's now the biggest of the babies and is really growing so well. We were finally permitted to take him off his heart rate monitor last week, so that was a tremendous milestone for us. One picture of him below, and that's it for this week's update.
Owen - Ummm...I didn't dress him
I just launched a new blog that is more focused on life simplification principals over at You, Simplified. The scope of things here at Scribe for the Tribe was a bit too broad. I'll still update this site on a semi-regular basis with updates on the babies but most of my other self-interest articles will go on the new blog.
I've been spending my free cycles over the last four weeks working on writing my first eBook online. It was meant as a means to put together a few great ideas on Life Simplification and then offer to would-be subscribers here and at You, Simplified, but since I can't seem to find a clean way to offer it up via Feedburner, and I'm loathe to try a new-to-me service like AWeber, I've just linked it off the new, simple, Downloads page on the main You, Simplified site. Please check it out and sign up for email alerts for when new articles are published.
The Book is called, aptly, "You, Simplified – Handbook for a Simpler Life."
It's a free eBook, running at 11,000 words and 53 pages. I cover five main topics in the book as follows:
1. Life Design 101 – Learn how to create a clear picture of the life you want, the life you were meant to live. Then engage in the steps necessary to clear your current life of distractions to let your new life in.
2. Simplify Your Stuff – Do not have anything around your home that is not either beautiful or extremely useful. You'll learn some techniques to clean up your home.
3. Simplify Your Commitments – Everyone has 24 hours in a day. How you spend them determines whether you will reach your goals or not.
4. Simplify Your Health – It can be hard to fit in regular exercise, but it really takes surprisingly little to get you into functional shape.
5. Simplify Your Finances – Most people stay in the rut that they are in because they need the money. Structure your finances in a way that will allow you to pursue your passions.
Last, but certainly not least, I've had the good fortune of having an article published today over at a terrific blog called Balance in Me. Please show some link love and head over there to check it out, "6 Life-Changing Lessons Learned in 6 Months of Raising 3 Babies."
I promise a baby update by this Wednesday. Thanks for reading and take care.
- Papa Charley
Filed under Blog by
There's a terrific post up over at Illuminated Mind that's inspiring this article laid out before you. While I don't always agree with the author, Jonathan Mead, the fact is that he nearly always stirs an emotion in me and that's what makes brilliant and effective writing.
In his article, The Number One Self-Development Mistake, And the Fake Growth Addict, I saw much of myself in both the positive AND negative pictures he was working to paint.
I am that seeker of knowledge who, for the last twenty years of my life (damn, I'm getting old) I have been pour through book after book of "esoteric" knowledge to try and "fix" me. But "fix" implies that I'm broken, that there's something seriously wrong with me, and that I'm unhappy with my current state.
This is sad, really sad.
I have a dream life by many standards. I have a terrific, well-paying job in a shytacular economy, I own several rental properties, have no consumer debt otherwise, have a beautiful wife and three beautiful, young babies. I have some talent and aptitude for writing and making music and I get true joy out of sharing this with the world.
Yet somehow I feel like I'm still broken, that I need to be fixed.
In this way, I am Jonathan's prototypical Fake Growth Addict.
I was trying to cure an invisible illness: my perceived inadequacy.
That inadequacy is a myth driven by the ego, and has nothing to do with real growth.
Yeah, that's me. I've read enough books on spirituality to logically understand the concept that we are already whole and complete beings. While the ego leads to some fun and rewarding pursuits, it really is hollow and we need to realize that. Happiness is not found in the pursuit of a worthy goal. Happiness just "is." It is a state that you can decide to be in, just as you elect to be angry, sad, or otherwise.
Jonathan's list of his own brushes with fake growth are what really resonated with me and wanted me to write an article "publicly" announcing my own foolish pursuits of personal growth:
- The pursuit of learning to be an early riser. I hate the early morning, but it's a rite of passage for the self help industry. You should hear me when I have to get up for the 4am feedings of the babies. I'm positively grouchy and I hate every minute of it. If I didn't have to do it for the babies, I wouldn't. I'd much rather stay up late into the wee hours of the morning to get my writing done in solitude.
- Reading a book just because other's claim the author is brilliant and life-changing. I really hated reading Eckhart Tolle, Wayne Dyer and especially Deepak Chopra. I find their style of writing unbearable, yet they are all brilliant men with a brilliant message, but I have never, and will likely never, finish a book of theirs. I haven't the patience to force my way thru to the message. I'd much rather read Paulo Coelho. Even on the fiction side, my reading sessions were quite brief of the Pulitzer Prize winning book, "The Brief, Wondrous Life of Oscar Wao." Another blogger I highly respect recommended the book but it's page after page of drivel about some poor, overweight kid trying to get laid. I abandoned it after 70 pages. Maybe this makes me an idiot; so be it. Let me revel in the perfection that is my idiocy.
- I actually feel like I've been conned by the number of times I've bought music that was highly recommended to expand my horizons, and then got nothing out of it except anger and regret from wasting another $15 on a useless piece of plastic. I used to feel stupid because I didn't "get it."
- I've tried to go Vegan a few times in my adulthood but man, I really like chicken wings. I live in Buffalo after all. I'm not adverse to trying again in the future, but I will hopefully come to it knowing that if I "fall off the wagon" that doesn't mean I'm a failure.
- Etc., Etc., Etc.
This is where self-improvement becomes detrimental, particularly when you're working from an Ego-centric model. For each of those examples above, I felt like a failure when I was unable to complete or sustain the effort. This inevitably made me feel worse than before I had the idea to try the pursuit or read the book. To combat that failure feeling, I would then rush out to find the next quick fix for my broken self.
I've had numerous false starts lately in my 100 Item Challenge and also in finishing up my book. These are not true failures. They are experiments, and if I fail to follow through each time, so be it. I may eventually find that the endeavor is not worth it.
I've heard it said numerous times that the way to ingrain a habit is to practice it for a few weeks straight. Well, I've done this before numerous times, and then fallen off the wagon some months later. So be it. Maybe the motivation to really do that "thing" wasn't strong enough. Maybe I was only doing that thing because I thought that's what an enlightenment person would do. It's more enlightening to realize that this might not be true.
So what's the answer?
If I'm able to recognize when I am being ego-centric in my self-development, then I can often divest myself of the feelings of inadequacy. It is better to approach life as a human, being; meaning that I am a spiritual being who's chosen to manifest as a human, experiencing and being all that I can reasonably experience. I'm here to learn, and that may mean learning by failure. I'm here to share my gifts and to experience other people's gifts. There is no true failure in this pursuit except for not "being," not trying.
Filed under Goals, Inspiration by
Droid
So I'm a bit of a gadget guy. Not hardcore, mind you, but I am enamored with gadgets that perform multiple functions (especially as I prepare for my 100 Item Challenge).
This past weekend my Verizon contract was up for renewal and with that they give us discounts on new phones. My philosophy on new phones in the past has been to get the tiniest, least conspicuos phone and so I had been toting around a little Juke for the last two years.
But now with the proliferation of Smart Phones I was intrigued by the release of Verizon's Motorola Droid. A gadget that acts as my phone, mp3 .player, browser, financial planner, book reader, and now blogging software means that it wins its way into my 100 Item List (and is arguably quite handy for my simple living sensibilities).
I'm using the Google App "wpToGo" to write this post. It can handle text, inserting of pictures and tags/categories. While it's not a fully functional Wordpress dashboard, it does the necessary to be able to blog on the run.
Yes, my thumbs hurt from typing but my skill level is still novice on a mobile keyboard.
Anyway, just a short post for today to test out this software. I'm. working on a nice long post inspired by Jonathan over at Illuminated Mind.
Filed under 100 Things by
I've written recently about my desire to slow down and let change happen. Part of that post contained the following text:
Absorbing and regurgitating self-help books at lightening speed is like taking a sip from a fire hose.
I do truly believe that enlightenment can be found in books, but unless it is applied in a practical nature, it is going to be fleeting, at best.
So, I've been journaling on what the most effective methods would be for getting the most out of my reading experience and decided that I would share some of my thoughts on the subject.
Read Less, But Read Regularly
Now, if you don't read at all, "Read Less" is not very helpful advice. But if you are a voracious reader like myself, you may find stepping back a bit to be helpful to your ability to retain more information.
I am trying to scale things back by 50% (not just in reading, but life in general). Over the last five years, I've averaged about thirty self-help books a year, with a couple of novels mixed in. I am probably on the low side of many readers out there. I also had a nasty habit of reading several books at once due to my varied interests.
I am making a goal one self-help book a month. And it becomes a To Do item with a due date.
The other important point here is to make it a regularly scheduled part of your day to read. It can be as little as fifteen minutes, but probably should not be more than an hour if you have other important tasks that need to get done.
This being November 1st, I am dedicating this month to Do Less, Achieve More by Chin-Ning Chu. I will provide my notes on this book sometime early in December, provided the book passes the next step.
Don't Waste Your Time on Books that Don't Interest You
There's a reason why the number one rule for writers is to hook the reader immediately. If you find yourself thirty to forty pages into a book and you're not sure why your reading this, then put it down and go onto something else. Life is too short to waste your time on books that aren't interesting.
Sure, we've all run into an instance where we've broken this rule and been rewarded with a truly great read in the end. I remember one particular summer after college where I persevered through Atlas Shrugged despite how dry it was early on, but it also so happened to be a time in my life when I was out of work and had plenty of time to blow.
Use your own judgement here, as with everything, but there are so many thousands of great books out there that you don't need to waste your time through something that may end up being sub-standard.
The corollary to this is that you should spend some time finding an interest first and therefore be in tune with what you want to learn.
Take Notes
Some folks like to write notes in the margins of the book. All the power to you, to each their own, yada yada yada.
I'm partial to my Moleskine journal, specific to the purpose of writing down the best stuff that I learn. I've always said that my journals are the most valuable books I own.
I suggest you don't just take notes like you would as a student for a test. Write down your thoughts and feelings about the material that you're reviewing.
This is as critical a piece to the learning process as is the actual reading of the books. That means you should take a few minutes, after each block of time reading to do this task. I actually prefer to take the notes as I read.
Really get into this, noting how the material can help you achieve your dreams and goals. If you're unable to find the value of the material than you should go back to Step 2 and really consider whether the book is worth your time.
Put It to The Test
Okay, now that you've put this much work in, don't let it die a slow death in the recesses of a dusty, withering (or is it weathering?) journal. Take three to four weeks to put the material to use in your own life. Better yet, make the whole month your trial as you read the book.
Document your life experiment as you go.
Treat your life as an experiment. Even when you think you've got it, don't just relax into your comfort zone. We are here to grow, to learn and to share.
Share Your Experiences
Yeah, this really is the final test. You've learned it, you've applied it, now try and teach it. The best way to show you've learned something and flatter an author is to write about your experiences. If you blog, write an article about it, or write a review on Amazon…something more personal than "I really liked this book." You can even mentor someone else with your new found skills.
Yes, this is a lot more work than blitzing through one book after another, but it's also more effective and you may find that you won't yearn for the next great secret in the pages of another book (I too, am guilty as charged).
I've decided to make my book reading experience more valuable to me and hopefully to my readers. I will be putting these steps into practice each month and share it as a more personal, hands-on type of book review. Like everything here at Scribe For The Tribe, the triplets set the schedule (Noah is in charge for November…which means no schedule) but I will try to get them in once a month.
On an unrelated note, November is National Novel Writer's Month where writers from all over the place come together and throw out the inner critic to whip together 50,000 or more words in thirty days to make a first draft of a novel. I've participated in this for each of the last five years, but due to the three new babies, I've taken a pass at it this year. It's great fun (if you consider pounding out an average of 1667 words a day fun) so do check in out at NaNoWriMo.
Filed under Goals, Power Thoughts by
I feel like I’ve lost a lot of momentum lately, like I’m half the person I was a few weeks ago. My spiritual mojo is shot lately. My will to do things is there, but the energy and time is not.
It troubled me and I meditated on it a bit while feeding my son, Noah this morning. I’ve been irritable, prone to angry outbursts and saying things that I don’t mean. In all honesty, I’ve thought several times recently whether this was all worth it. I realize my honesty will open me up to criticism, but this is my public sounding board so I accept it.
I felt like the children were taking up too much time and energy (all of it), and my day job of managing large-scale projects was draining my reserves. My ego-driven psycho-babble self was feeling resentful that I’ve had to give up a great many enjoyable tasks (music, writing, exercise etc.) already.
As a general rule, I don't want to become another example of a generation living only to support the next generation and so I felt threatened when my dreams were put on hold yet again.
I’m not proud of any of this. I’m far from being a perfect person, and while I feel a little better admitting this, I still need to address it and fix it (i.e. get the Ego to take a back seat).
So as I sat with Noah, feeding him, staring at his big, beautiful eyes, admitting my imperfections and vowing for the one hundredth time that I would do better, I figured out what's been happening.
My brain doesn't know what to do with all of this yet.
It's all new, all the sensations, the stress, the belief that every triplet's cry is a screeching firedrill, that the success of a work project rests solely on my shoulders. It's blowing out my comfort zone and until my brain can burn the new neural pathways to handle this, I have to admit that I will keep making mistakes, that I will continue to be an irritable, pathetic mess, and that my wife and children are saints for putting up with me.
This is why I haven't the energy to write more than a few scattered words, to embrace the challenges at work with continuity, to handle the stresses of screaming babies with grace and patience.
It's times like these when you have to stop forcing it.
Let the brain build the neural pathways so that new actions and new habits can be ingrained.
Absorbing and regurgitating self-help books at lightening speed is like taking a sip from a fire hose. Your brain adapts at its own speed and despite what the Law of Attraction proponents say otherwise, it may take you longer to adapt than it would the next person. It make take a lot longer to adapt than you can process information.
That's okay.
I'm realizing that it's not a race between me and "X blogger" to see who can put out a book or who can get to 5,000 subscribers first.
You should be focusing on creating the best "you," not a poor facsimile of someone else.
It's in these moments I am reminded of the wisdom of detachment, in passively viewing as you let your life unfold naturally rather than forcing every particular technique and life hack (no disrespect to lifehack.org, I am a fan) into your routine. You may seek success, but take the time to understand, apply, and integrate the new thoughts and processes. Don't just jump onto the next great thing.
So, for me, that means slowing down a bit, letting the new habits of parenthood burn their pathways into my brain first, since they are the most important. Then from there, evaluate to see if I am ready for the next area of growth, whatever that may be.
I've spoken about slowing down several times lately, but the Ego keeps creeping in to try to push me to the next level. While I would love to be a full time blogger/writer so that I can stay home and be a better parent/husband to my kids and wife, I need to focus first on the be the better parent/husband part, then worry about the other goals later…and most importantly, I need to be okay with that decision…and that's the hardest part.
Filed under Power Thoughts, Success by
